Author Archives: Cadbury Fife

Scathing Review of Existence

The reviews are in on this glam sham monsteropolis of living known as civilization, The reviews are in like buttons on the existence bomb of time, And I carry them into town on the rolling blue bus with a razor, Why, I … Continue reading

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Monsteropolis

When people come to visit me, they say my city is stupid, That its architecture is a hotchpotch of cliches, And that they were expecting something far better from the advertising. Where are the people, they say? Where is the vibe? … Continue reading

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28: A lot of squirming in the room

Cellos and saxophones beat each other up against the wall of rustling created by hundreds of unsettled guests. The light from the opened door glared into their eyes, the writhing dancers slithered into their minds, and the flashing screen announcements … Continue reading

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a hard day’s clicking

perhaps you like to think you have a capitalization on human depth. perhaps you like to think that your holistic plagiarism of the human condition is something other than holistic, despite the sweet succulence of my aforementioned derivation of said … Continue reading

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the madness

i’m at the local place where the people gather to consume each other and i realize: everyone has the madness everyone has a number printed on their forehead a number between 0 and 100 and it is our chance of … Continue reading

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love pirates!

we are the love pirates stealin’ yo love and taking it out to sea we bury it in a sunken grave in a chest encrusted with barnacles secured with rusty chains guarded by a family of angry octopi we mark … Continue reading

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Anyone want a Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrappuccino?

So, I’m sauntering the sultry streets the other day, when I felt the urge to slink into my local Slurp-N-Lurk. Once inside I ordered my usual from this establishment – a Grapefruit Frappuccino and a Pumpberry Cake – and received … Continue reading

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27: More frustrating than a bottle of frustration pills

Down the stairs came a striped pair of legs. Impressive legs, robust yet cultured, bearing a staunch yet fashionable gait. Gullet: Representative Piper. From behind the Representative emerged a companion who seemed more concerned about the process of walking than … Continue reading

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26: It was the Detection Party

The  moon was full and bloated. The air was crisp.  The crack of car doors opening as guests arrived gave a resonant echo. Though its entrance, and the security personnel guarding it, maintained an  uninviting, somber presence, HurtyVibes was glittering on … Continue reading

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25: Burrowed into its bamboozling heart

“Hello, Cadbury Fife”, the voice was disconnected, pointedly sexual, yet with some type of indeterminate undertone. Cadbury: I do not like your indeterminate undertone. Is there a light or any sort of illuminating substance in here? Cadbury preferred to control … Continue reading

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